Your Kids Want to Spend Time with You

For whatever reason, as children become teenagers, they often begin to pull away from parents. This can make spending time with them difficult, and in the process many parents give up (often with good intentions like giving them ‘space’ or letting them become more ‘independent.’) However, in spite of every action, attitude, and word that says otherwise, they desperately want to spend time with you. How do I know? Because they tell me. Consistently. And when I tell them to talk to you (their parents) about it, they look at me like I have 13 heads and a big red nose. I don’t know why, but they do. 

There’s good news. The answer is simple. Spend time with them. Go on a ‘date’ with your kids. If you find that they are still groaning at the idea of family time may I make another suggestion? Let them pick what you do. Don’t always force them into ‘family fun’ (although that isn’t bad either). Occasionally, let them decide. I know of one mom whose son was a skater. So what did she do? She took him to skate shops or the skate park and spent time with him in his world. Don’t just drop them off. Take them out. If you daughter loves to shop, take her to the mall for the day and just follow her around. You don’t have to spend tons of money, or even any money at all, the point is BEING WITH THEM. It doesn’t really matter what you do.

From my experience, I wouldn’t hold your breath and wait to hear how much they loved or appreciated that time with you. But, I have NEVER EVER had a kid tell me they actually don’t like time with their parents. They ALL, and I am not exaggerating here, tell me that (even though many of them hate to admit it) they feel special, loved, and valued when their mom or dad makes an investment of time with them.

I will say this a lot: obviously not every kid is the same, and I have not talked to every kid in the world. However, every kid that I have had the opportunity to talk to about this particular topic, have all said the same thing. They are yours for a reason. God knew you would be the right mom and dad for your specific child. You may not know what you were 'created to do', but one thing I know for sure, you are called to be their parent. What you choose to do with that calling, is up to you.